Down memory lane

This weekend I am in New York visiting my family. Today my dad and I took my kids to the beach where I spent large portions of my childhood. And every time I go there I feel like I'm walking down memory lane.

When I was a child I spent a lot of time with my grandparents. My parents were divorced when I was very young and my mom and I lived either with my grandparents or around the corner from them until I was 11 years old. My grandparents had a boat. Really they had boats for years. I only remember the last one they owned. But I spent most of my childhood summers on that boat. And most summers that boat was docked at a marina about 20 minutes from our house. I have so many good memories of that marina and the beach it was connected to.

So when I come home to NY, it is to that beach and marina that I take my children. As I walk along the dock and look at the boats, noting their names and lets be honest, lusting after them, I feel like I am stepping back in time. I can feel my Poppa walking next to me, his hand on my shoulder. I can see myself as a child running around with the other kids, clamming with my grandmother, and playing in the sand. I miss it so much.

I love living just outside Washington for a number of reasons but what I miss most from my old life is the beach and the boats. Of course you can boat on the Potomac but we can't afford that and it just isn't the same as the Great South Bay where I spent so many childhood summers. As we walked today Q kept asking when we could go on the boats. I was sad to tell him there would be no boats for us today.

There is something special about seeing my children in a place that holds so much meaning for me. I could feel my Poppa there and for a moment I could imagine what it would have been like if he could have met Q and C. It was like my past and future colliding in one place and it was bittersweet. It was cool at the beach today and after a time we headed home to meet my mom. I know we'll be back, probably before the summer is over.

I wonder what memories my children will take to heart, what place they will bring their children to try to see the past and future in one place. I hope I am around to meet their children and make new memories. But for now I will just bask in the memory of warm summers, the feel of my grandfather's spirit in the air, and my children's laughter.